Spoil-Free Reviews: The Imitation Game
So it has finally arrived. Benedict Cumberbatch’s Oscar bait film of the year The Imitation Game has made its slow ass way to DC. I have finally seen it and I will tell you how good it really was. Admittedly I am a little biased when it comes to this movie, I’m obsessed with everything […]
A Series of Words in Which I Answer All the Questions No One Asked
In honor of my return, and rapper turned pastor turned rapper, who was recently forced to delete his Instagram account when it turned out he was as irrelevant as everyone but he already suspected: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adg6iEz3-Ow Where have you been? Well actually I had to take a break from all the things I really really love […]
Warrior of Westeros- Round 3
I—like everyone not named Molly Lambert (who I am convinced is the only person with an IQ above 55 who doesn’t like Game of Thrones)—have been jonesing ever since Tyrion and Arya sailed off into the distance…literally. I’ve got a little bit of help for you—the Tournament of Champions continues. If you’re new to the […]
Taking the hit: Pilot Season
This is a journal of my experiences with 2014 pilot/premiere season. Some shows are coming out that look exciting, some are coming out that look repulsive, I will be watching them all and telling you how worthwhile these shows really are. If you’re looking for new shows to get hooked on, I’ll tell you which […]
COUR- Stuck in Paradise
Two 83 hour flights later I was in Hawaii with my family. For those of you that caught my post before it was censored by the communist dictatorship I was not too thrilled with that. One of the many days I was in Hawaii—or as the ridiculous Polynesian language would insist you pronounce it, Hughvviee—we […]
A Rant About Vacation, That Ends with Me as the Villain
UPDATED 8/18/2014: People… namely my family were worried other members of my family would see this. Therefore as not to receive shit from those same people about feelings that are hardly a secret, I am voluntarily censoring myself. Yes I am very upset about this, no there isn’t shit to be done. Maybe I should’ve […]
Power Ranking Literally Anything: Everything Modern Who
Doctor Who‘s newest series is right around the corner. So in honor of one of the greatest SciFi shows of all time here is a PRLA of everything Doctor Who has to offer. I am not the biggest Doctor Who fan you will ever meet. I’ve never bothered to go back and watch the entirety of […]
Spoil-Free Review: Guardians of the Galaxy
“Well that shit just happened”. Basically those were my thoughts leaving Guardians of Galaxy. I expected greatness when I went to go see Marvel’s newest monster hit, if I hadn’t I wouldn’t have seen it at 9:45 on a Thursday in Imax 3D. But there was no part of me, not even the most optimistic […]
Lucy: A Look Back on What Could’ve Been
This is not a review. At the end you will know no more about whether Lucy was good or bad than you did going in. This is me, after five days of stewing, countless Grantland articles and podcasts, and a few “more reputable” sources such as the New York Times about this movie—the ones of […]
The Emmys and the Curiously Competent Case of the Nominally Not-so-terrible Nominations
Northern Virginia traffic and ten hour work days strike again. I have had this article on the to-do pile since they released the nominations. I promised myself this time though I would get this piece out before it was too late. I missed the Oscars this year because of such nonsense. So I am writing […]
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